What makes a child independent? That’s an important question that we’ll be discussing today in this article.
Children want to be left alone to do what they want and they tend to be more confident doing their own things.
Independence breeds self-reliance, a crucial step in development from a very young age. Encouraging your child to independent as early as possible will help him to be successful and confident as he grows.
What is an independent child?
An Independent child feels confident and capable of taking care of himself. He is demanding and self-reliant and wants to handle everything on his own.
Qualities of an independent child.
- They are fearless. An independent child is not scared of taking risks. He loves to explore the world. They explore on their own. They want to discover things on their own, how things are done and tend to find the problem and provide solution.
- They are rarely bored: A self-motivated child invests his time in outdoor activities like sports or any activity they are interested in.
- They are expressive. A child having freedom to express his thoughts and observations shows independence. A child’s confidence is built if he is able to trust and express his perception of the things around him.
- They like being in charge. They tend to control things and people around them. They prefer to take lead of the team. They are dominant.
- They boom around others. An independent child feels free with people even in your absence. He thrives when you are not around him and is able to communicate freely with his friends and teachers.
- They are problem solvers. An independent child prefers to solve his problems and is happy doing it. They don’t usually need your help to get things done and would like you to allow them to figure out the solution.
- They enjoy doing things by themselves. One of the signs of independence in a child is trying out tasks on their own. They love to do so many things on their own with little or no help from you as a parent. My sons love to dish their own food and it makes them happy.
- They are full of ideas. They tend to bring their own ideas and creativity. It is important to create the room for your child to think and create his own ideas which will encourage him to be successful. Having great ideas show they can succeed in life.
- They feel comfortable to ask questions and explore at home. They are free-spirited and can ask you numerous question. They are inquisitive in nature.
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What makes a child independent?
A child is independent when he or she is capable of doing some task on it’s own without requiring a help from a parent or guardian.
1. Self-Responsibility:
Children who are independent, take responsibility for their actions. They are aware of the effects of their choices and take lessons from both achievements and setbacks.
2. Critical Thinking:
When your child learn how to think critically, they become more independent. Their independence is increased when they are encouraged to examine circumstances, find solutions to issues, and come to their own conclusions.
3. Effective Communication:
Encouraging your child to communicate their needs, wants, and thoughts helps them become more self-sufficient in their exploration of the world. Good communication increases confidence and promotes self-advocacy.
4. Initiative:
Children who are self-reliant demonstrate initiative by taking the lead in assignments and activities. Their sense of autonomy is increased when they are allowed to follow their own interests and aspirations.
5. Time management:
Being independent requires being able to manage your time well. Children who are good at prioritizing, organizing their work, and meeting deadlines feel more in charge of their activities.
6. Resilience:
Gaining resilience is necessary to become independent. Children who possess the ability to overcome obstacles, adjust to new circumstances, and recover from failures are more prepared to manage life on their own.
7. Ability to Make Decisions:
Making decisions is a requirement for independence. Giving your child the chance to make age-appropriate decisions aids in their decision-making abilities and sense of self-worth.
8. Basic Life Skills:
Teach your child life skills that they can use on their own as they get older, like cleaning, cooking, and personal hygiene, helps them to be self-sufficient.
9. Financial literacy:
Children who are equipped with the knowledge and skills necessary to manage their money responsibly as they grow up will enable them to make wise financial decisions as adults.
10. Social Skills:
Being independent requires more than just possessing personal qualities; it also entails knowing how to interact with others. Gaining proficiency in social skills like empathy, collaboration, and conflict resolution, contributes to a well-rounded, independent individual.
Below are list of what you should do to help make your child to be independent.
- Encourage them to do tasks alone
- Teach them how to care for others
- Give them chores
- Reward and applaud their good work.
- Let them prepare for school themselves
- Teach them savings culture
- Let him resolve the problem or conflicts themselves
- Let them fail
At what age does a child become independent?
Most parents consider their child to be independent at age 12. They believe that they are able to to carry out different activities on their own like;
- Look after their younger siblings
- Walk to school on their own
- Stay home on their own
- Cook
- Go shopping
How do I teach my child to be independent?
One of the ways to teach your child to be independent is by giving the child chores to do in the house, it helps the child learn how to independent.
The list goes as follows;
- Give them age appropriate responsibilities
- Set predictable routines
- Let your child choose
- Let him help
- Give him chores to do
- Allow him solve problems accordingly
- Encourage them to carry out mini projects
- Let them set their goals for their future.
- Teach them to follow routines at an early age.
- Learn about their abilities and when they should do it.
- Appreciate their efforts
- Reward them accordingly
Activities to Encourage Independence
1. Assign daily chores.You can assign your child a daily task like putting dirty clothes in the laundry bag, taking the plates to the table, clearing dishes after eating, cleaning the table. There is no need of rewarding them on daily routine.
2. Don’t do everything for them. There are many things your child can do independently and you should let him do it. You can allow him to brush his teeth, bath and dress up for school. Encouraging them to do the things they can do makes them independent.
3. Love, Respect and Patience. Always show love to your child, respect his decisions and also learn to be patient with him. This builds his confidence, encourages him to do things on his own, and discover new things.
4. Teach them life skills. Teaching your kids skills like cooking, cleaning, laundry, management and ability to follow through will go a long way to help them in life as they turn to adults. Having skills will nurture them into independent adults full of knowledge.
5. Give them responsibilities. As we all know, hardwork pays. You should assign tasks to your child at home like cleaning up the mess they make, taking care of their bedroom, pack away toys, put away dirty clothes will in turn groom them well. House chores will teach them valuable life skills, hard work, responsibility and respect for themselves as well as others.
6. Appreciate their efforts. Little compliments about the things they do will encourage them, build their self confidence and make them do more.
6. Let them make their choices. You can provide options and let them choose. Allow them to make wise decisions. You can ask your child to make a choice of the clothes he wants to put on.
7. Ask for their opinion. Talking regularly with your kids is a good thing and try to also show interest in their own business. Learn to seek for their own opinions and have their interests at heart.
7. Allow them resolve their problems. People management like how to handle things with people, managing relationships and interacting are part of being independent. Let them settle their conflicts with their siblings and friends themselves. Allow them to apologize willingly and not forcefully. This will help them develop skills on how to resolve conflicts.
8. Make them accountable for their actions. Exerting the right discipline will help them to be responsible. Let them know about the consequences of their actions and take accountability for it.
What should a toddler (1-3 years) be able to do independently?
- Clean up their toys
- Take off their clothes like jackets
- Put dirty clothes away
- Put away toys
- Sort dirty clothes
- Jumps off the ground with both feet
- Put their shoes by the door
- Points their eyes, legs, hands and some body parts.
- Carry their own lunch boxes
- Use hands to twist things
- Put their plates in the sink
- Pick out their clothes
What should a 7 year old be able to do independently?
He can do the following independently;
- Make his bed
- Clean their room
- They can assist you in the kitchen
- Take his bath
- Prepare his breakfast and lunch
- Packing his pack bag
What should a Preschooler (4-5 years) be able to do independently?
- He enjoys playing with friends
- He can set table.
- Helps feed pets
- Clean up or organize toys
- Clean his bedroom
- Put away laundry
- Understand rules of game
- Express himself when angry.
- Walk up the stairs
- Stand on one foot for few seconds
- He can hop
- Draw circle, square, triangle and some simple shapes.
- Walk forward and backward.
- Count 10 or more objects.
- Name some shapes
- Recognize and write some letters.
- Have a great attention span
What should an Elementary (6-9 years) be able to do independently?
- They can sweep or vacuum
- Put away dishes
- Load dishwasher or wash dishes
- Help with laundry (sort, loaf and put away)
- Clean sinks and counters
- They are skilled at interacting with adults and peers.
- They use eye contact
- They develop exciting friendships
- They enjoy school
- Open lunch items independently
- They take more responsibilities
- Brush their own teeth and also bath themselves.
- May be able to play instruments
- Tie their shoe laces.
- Know about days of the week
- Can read simple sentences
- Complete single digits addition and subtraction
- They can differentiate between left and right.
- Know how to count simple multiplication tables like 2-5.
What should a Preteen (10-12 years) be able to do independently?
- They prepare and cook meals
- Scrub tubs, sinks, toilets
- They can mop
- Do away with trash
- Do laundry
- Dusting, vacuuming and cleaning
- Clean windows
- Putting away their belongings
- Feeding and walking pets
- Washing dishes
- Doing laundry and folding clothes
- Setting up the table
- Get ready for bed without force
- Demonstrates safety awareness with strangers
- Showers on their own
- Obeys traffic signs
- Calls for help if needed
- Shows caution with dangerous objects
Why is it important for a child to be independent?
It is important for a child to be independent because,
- It boosts their self-esteem, self-confidence and perseverance
- It promotes self-reliance making your child feel he has control over his life.
- It gives him a sense of belonging and importance.
- It makes him develop a level of self-awareness and sensitivity towards other people.
- It fosters self-motivation.
- It makes them become great decision makers.
- It boosts competence and self trust.
- It gives them freedom of expression.
- It makes them develop some vital qualities and skills like patience, self-help, concentration, self-discipline and cooperation.
- It also gives them the freedom to experience life fully and learn important lessons.
- It makes them happy and healthy giving them great sense of success and achievement.
What makes a child independent is their ability to carry out all the above points and feel fulfilled doing it.